Do-It-Yourself-ing

Much to my continued surprise, I find myself a New Yorker.  And by that, I don’t merely mean that I happen at this moment to live in New York.  I mean that I hate to drive.  That I’m overwhelmed by big box stores.  When I go to Times Square, I no longer marvel at its majesty, but instead complain about the tourists who block my route from the subway to the theater by staring up in the sky and posing for pictures with the Naked Cowboy.

But I’ve come to realize that there’s one part of me that’s still from the rest of the country.  New Yorkers, more than any other people I know, hire people to do their work.  They have housekeepers, doormen, handymen, personal trainers, personal shoppers, and dogwalkers. They send out their laundry.  And they have everything under the sun delivered.

Apparently I haven’t quite made that leap.  This week, I shocked my NYC friends by painting the wall of our apartment all by my lonesome.  Here’s the proof:

 

And next week I just might slap up some wallpaper.

Now, this DIY stuff is nothing new to me.  Back when my sewing machine still worked, I sewed my own clothes. And when I bought my first house on a baby DA’s salary, I spent every weekend at Home Depot.  By the time I sold that house three years later, I had tiled a hearth, lineoleumed a laundry room, laid down a wood plank floor, painted thousands of square feet of walls, replaced two faucets, and even built a cedar fence.  Consider me handy.

And in many ways, my recent painting adventure was typical of my do-it-yourself tendencies.  I do my own taxes.  I made my own video trailer for my new book, 212.  I navigate my way through the lay-out for the (admittedly imperfect) newsletter I send to my mailing list. And today, I’ve tinkered once again, creating a mystery thank-you gift to send to online friends who pre-order 212.   (Details below, online friends.)

But if you ask my husband, I’m no DIY-er.  He teases me that if we had enough money, I’d hire a butler to cater to my every whim.  Why would he tease me that way?  Because despite lingering self-reliance, in some ways, I have begun to adjust to the New York way.  My dog, the Duffer, has both a dogwalker and a daycare center.  I’ve been known to have wine, groceries, and even a small container of chicken soup from the downstairs-deli delivered.  If it were up to me, we’d send out our laundry instead of dealing with the apartment complex laundry room.  And, I’m ashamed to say it, I once paid a woman to clean out my closet.

So what’s the deal? Why do I happily entrust some aspects of my life to others while I pride myself on handling the rest on my own?  Am I hopelessly conflicted and inconsistent, or is there some method to my madness?

I tried to hire someone to figure it out for me, but couldn’t find anyone on Craig’s List (kidding, of course).  The most noble explanation is that I recognize which tasks I’m either really bad at or simply hate to do.  I’m bad at throwing out old clothes from my cluttered closet, but I’m good at taxes.  I hate folding laundry, but creating my home-made book trailer was pretty damn fun.

Or maybe it’s about bragging rights.  You can bet that I told every person who visited my Portland house that I built that (semi-crooked) fence myself.  And if I do take on that wallpaper job, I’m sure I’ll point to every bubble and wrinkle like a gold medal.  But there’s no glory to be gained in doing laundry or preventing your closet from ending up on the next episode of Hoarders.

Or, you know, maybe I’m just random and incoherent about these things.  I’d love to hear from others on this.  What sorts of things, both in your work and home life, do you do yourself, and when would you prefer to hire out? 

P.S. As I mentioned, my most recent tinkering was on a special mystery thank-you gift for online friends who pre-order my new book, 212.  For every hardback copy of 212 purchased by March 22, I will send a mystery gift to thank you for supporting my work.  See details here.  (And, yep, I did the html myself so forgive the imperfections.)

What Would Princess Leia Do?

By Allison Brennan

 

Yesterday, I made the time to attend my local RWA meeting where New York Times bestselling author Alyssa Day spoke about heroines. Alyssa is a talented paranormal romance writer who has a reputation for writing alpha heros AND alpha heroines. I asked her permission to talk about her workshop on this blog because I think it would benefit ALL writers, not simply romance or romantic suspense authors.

Alyssa’s workshop was hugely inspirational and beneficial to me. A lot of people might think that after 13 published books why would I want to attend a craft workshop? The same reason why I bought Donald Maass’ FIRE IN FICTION last summer–I am still learning. While I believe my strength in writing is centered around my heroines, I also believe that all writers, no matter what their level or how many books under their belt, published or unpublished, can learn something simply by listening to others. Sometimes it’s not like we learn something particularly new, but we are given a new way of looking at something we know and it broadens our perceptions and our craft.

Yesterday was just such a day for me.

I write strong heroines. My hardest characters are the heroines who are not in a naturally kick-ass professional. For example, Julia Chandler (prosecutor in SEE NO EVIL) or Robin McKenna (night club owner in KILLING FEAR.) Why? Because when your heroine has a role like cop or FBI Agent or P.I. reader expectations are that the character knows how to take care of themselves, that they are independent and strong-willed. Female cops are not wimps, for the most part, and I don’t have to convince my readers that Detective Carina Kincaid (SPEAK NO EVIL) knows how to investigate a murder. I can simply put her in the middle of the investigation and give her the label “detective” and readers get it.

I’ve judged the Thrillers for four years, and there are a lot of fantastic books I’ve read–the finalists and some that haven’t finaled. I love thrillers, suspense, mysteries, romantic suspense, anything with twists, turns, high stakes. One thing I’ve noticed is that some writers–many male writers, but even some female writers– create stereotypes for their female characters. The femme fatale. The man-hating cop. The wimpy Perilous Pauline. Some books are more about the hero’s journey–and that’s fine. But good books have strong secondary characters, too, and while stereotypes can (and often should) be used in writing, they should be relegated to the third tier characters.

The female protagonist–whether she is a true heroine (i.e. equal to the hero, like in a romantic suspense novel) or a secondary character (such as a partner or an ex-wife)–is crucial to a strong story. Alyssa’s advice to writers is terrific. For example, is your heroine strong or passive? Does she DO things or is she always having things DONE for her? Can she solve her own problems, or is she always looking for the hero to do it?

There is nothing I hate more than a woman who can’t do anything for herself. This doesn’t mean she has to do EVERYTHING for herself, but she should have common sense. If she has a flat tire, she might not know how to change it, but she damn well knows how to use a cell phone. Or flag down a truck. Or capable of walking a mile to the nearest gas station. (And yes, some women–not me–know how to change a tire.)

If you have an important female character, does she advance the plot in any way? Or is she standing around wringing her hands waiting for the big, strong guy to save her? (Gag.)

Alyssa identifies five core character traits of a strong heroine:

 

  • She’s an independent thinking and makes intelligent choices.
  • She has a sense of humor–she can face conflict and adversity and be able to laugh at herself or her weaknesses.
  • She’s ready and willing to fight, either it’s physically or not. Meaning, she should be able to defend herself verbally or physically, to stand up for what’s right, and not always cave to those seemingly bigger or stronger.
  • She should accept her hero as he is and not try to change him.
  • She should be able to face everyday situations with strength and resilience.

 

Smart choices, the first point, is crucial, but often misunderstand. It’s not always that we can make the RIGHT choice. Sometimes, we don’t have all the information we need. Sometimes, we have to do something we know is wrong because the stakes are so high. Sometimes, we’re in a lose-lose situation. ACTION is what’s important, that inaction is a sign of weakness. Inaction in fact is a character trait. But strong heroines will do what they think is right given the circumstances–they have strong motivation in doing what they do.

Some writers, Alyssa points out, take the idea of a strong heroine to mean she has to be perfect, flawless, beautiful at all times. WRONG! I love Alyssa’s comment, “I believe in Kryptonite.” Meaning, every character has a fatal flaw. Perhaps the flaw is physical or emotional or situational. Every character has their own Kryptonite. (This goes for heroes, heroines, villains, secondary characters–doesn’t matter who! But it’s doubly important for your protagonists and your villain.)

But in the end, what I loved most about Alyssa’s workshop was when she ended with when you’re stuck, just think:

What would Princess Leia do?

So now I have that phrase etched in my mind as I finish the copyedits for CARNAL SIN. My problem in writing is not usually the heroine–my heroine’s are generally strong. Sometimes TOO strong. In FEAR NO EVIL I had my first hero who wasn’t in law enforcement paired with a heroine who was a renegade FBI Agent. I had to make sure that my trained, smart, and talented heroine wasn’t stronger than my forensic psychiatrist hero. So to resolve the central problem, it was my hero’s ability to think like the villain that gave them the edge to save lives–not my heroine’s training or law enforcement background.

A female character I’ve been hugely impressed with is FBI Agent Olivia Dunham from FRINGE. Olivia is trained, strong, independent, but she also has a vulnerable side. She can love, she has a sister and niece she is close to but her job keeps getting in the way of her promises. This bothers her, but she is driven to do the job well. She is not hardened, but she can be tough. She doesn’t make too-stupid-to-live decisions–when she makes a risky decision it is always with the purpose of saving an innocent life. She is smart and capable and not too rigid. 

In LIFE, the erroneously canceled NBC series starring Damian Lewis as Det. Charlie Crews, his partner Dani Reece is another example of a strong female character who has flaws but still gets up every day to do the job. She’s a recovering drug addict. She has a problem with relationships and therefore has one-night stands instead of any steady boyfriend. She’s a good cop, but is overshadowed by her well-known retired father, also a cop. She changes over the course of the two-season series to be able to have 1) a friendship with her partner and 2) a relationship that last more than one night (not with her partner) and 3) the courage to try to move up the ladder on her own merits.

And of course Princess Leia. She was a princess, after all, but she was also capable of taking charge. (So what if she got them trapped in the trash compactor? At least she DID something rather than stand around and be shot at!)

I’d love to hear more examples of strong female characters, and some of your pet peeves about heroines and female characters . . . rant away!

 

The Fairy Tale structure

by Alexandra Sokoloff

Two weeks ago, as part of my own “What the @#$% am I going to write next?” ramblings, I posted about making random lists of basically everything in the known universe that appeals to me and looking through those lists for patterns.

One thing I’ve learned about myself as a writer, partly by making lists! is that my favorite stories of all are fairy tales and myths – which are often interchangeable, although story structuralists Christopher Vogler and John Truby make good arguments that stories with mythic structure and stories with fairy tale structure have their own rules and formulas.

And indeed, the couple of stories that are beginning to take shape in my head have tons of fairy tale elements.   This, at least is familiar territory to me, exciting territory.

When I respond deeply to a movie or book, no matter how realistic and modern it seems on the surface, chances are it’s going to have a fairy tale structure.    

SILENCE OF THE LAMBS, RED DRAGON, THE EXORCIST, THE GODFATHER, A WRINKLE IN TIME, STAR WARS, SLUMDOG MILLIONAIRE, THE TREATMENT (Mo Hayder) – every single one of them is a fairy tale.   And fairy tales have their own structural rules that just work for me.

I know JT and Cornelia have blatantly (my favorite approach) used fairy tales in at least a few of their books.

Anyone who wants a quick lesson on the fairy tale structure in action,  should go out and rent PAN’S LABYRINTH.   Wonderful, heartbreaking film, one of the best in years.

That movie has a blatant fairy tale structure, and as in so many fairy tales, the heroine is told by her mentor and ally the faun that she must perform three tasks to save the underworld kingdom and reclaim her place as the princess of that world (and thus escape her horrifying reality in 1944 Spain.)  

The three-task structure is SO useful and successful because it tells the audience exactly what they’re in for.   Audiences (and readers – but especially audiences) need to know that things will come to an end eventually, otherwise they get restless and worried that they will never get out of that theater.   I’m not kidding.    And a reader, particularly a promiscuous reader like me, will bail on a book if it doesn’t seem to be escalating and progressing at a good clip.   But with a three-task structure, the audience is, at least subconsciously, mentally ticking off each task as it is completed, and that gives a satisfying sense of progress toward a resolution.  

Plus once you’ve set a three-task structure, you can then play with expectation, as Del Toro did in PAN’S LABYRINTH, and have the heroine FAIL at one of the tasks, say, the second task, and provide a great moment of defeat, a huge reversal and surprise, that in this case was completely emotionally wrenching because of the heroine’s very dire real-life situation.

Another classic fairy tale structure is the three-brother or three-sister structure.   You know, as in The White Cat, or The Boy Who Had to Learn Fear, or Cinderella.    In this structure there is one task that is the goal, and we watch all three siblings attempt it, but it’s always the youngest and ostensibly weakest sibling that gets it right.

Another Rule Of Three fairy tale structure deals with the three magical allies.   THE WIZARD OF OZ has this – Scarecrow, Tin Man, Lion;  the animated classic SLEEPING BEAUTY – fairy godmothers Flora, Fauna and Merriwether; HARRY POTTER, obviously, with the three magical mentors Dumbledore, MacGonegal and Hagrid; A WRINKLE IN TIME – the “witches”: Mrs. Whatsit, Mrs. Who, Mrs Which; and STAR WARS – R2D2, C3P0, Han Solo (Okay, there’s four, Chewbacca, but he’s so joined at the hip to Han that they’re really one entity.).   Magical allies give gifts, and they provide substructure for stories by each having their moment or moments of aiding the hero/ine.

I must point out that you DO NOT have to be writing a fantasy to use any of these structural techniques.   They all can work just as well in the most grittily realistic story.   Just look at THE GODFATHER, the most classic modern example I know of the three-brother structure.   There’s the old king, the Godfather; the two older brothers, Sonny, with his lethal temper, and Fredo, with his weak womanizing; and the youngest brother, Michael, who is the outsider in the family: college-educated, Americanized, kept apart from the family business, and thought of as the weakest.   And throughout the story we see this unlikely younger brother ascend to his father’s throne (even though it’s about the last thing we want.)

You can see the three-brother structure working loosely in MYSTIC RIVER, with the three friends who are all cursed by a horrific childhood event that inextricably binds their fates together.  Lehane even uses a fairy tale analogy in the tale:  “The Boy Who Was Captured By Wolves,” and the fairy-tale resonances in that book and film contribute to its haunting power.

THE DEERHUNTER is another three-brother structure, that opens with another huge fairy tale story element: a curse.  The whole first sequence is a wedding, complete with unwanted guest (the Green Beret who won’t talk to the three friends about Vietnam), and at the height of the merrymaking the bride and groom drink from the same cup and spill wine on the bride’s gown, thus bringing on the curse for all three friends.

THE DEERHUNTER also utilizes another classic structure technique, also common in fairy tales:   The Promise.   In the first act, when the friends are on the mountain, hunting, on their last day before three of them are shipped off to Vietnam, Nick asks Michael to make sure that he doesn’t leave him over in Vietnam.   Even if he dies, he wants to return home.   “Promise me, Mike,” he says.  “You gotta promise me you won’t leave me over there.”

You KNOW when you get a promise scene that the story is going to be about that friend keeping the promise.   It’s an anchor to the action of the story – one of those spell-it-out moments that lets an audience subconsciously relax, because they understand what the story is going to be about – and they know the WRITER knows what the story is about, too.   That’s a comfortable feeling.   You have to let your audience/reader know that you know what your story is about.

The point is, if you really look closely at stories on your list, you might just find a similar meta-structure at work that will help you shape your own story. 

As I’ve mentioned here before, I’m seeing a therapist who is heavily on the Jung side (or at least is canny enough to understand that that’s about the only way he’s going to get through to me), so he’s been having me read a lot of fairy tale analyses: there is some hugely great stuff out there.   THE MAIDEN KING, by Robert Bly and Marion Woodman;  WOMEN WHO RUN WITH THE WOLVES; Clarissa Pinkola Estes; IRON JOHN, Robert Bly (not at all the squishy male power book I had always assumed it was); and Marie-Louise Von Franz has a classic series on fairy tales that I am looking forward to.

(I’m with Cornelia, though – steer away from Bettelheim).

But the best of all is to just read the tales themselves – Andrew Lang’s Blue Fairy Book and the other colors in that world fairy tale set are wonderful, bloody, and have fantastic, evocative illustrations.

So of course today I am looking for examples – of your own books and your favorite books with fairy tale elements or structure.   And of course – your own favorite fairy tales!

– Alex

Screenwriting Tricks For Authors

RAMBLIN’ ON…

By Stephen Jay Schwartz

 

It’s a story about guilt, about a powerful man’s sense of entitlement and how his assumptions cause an innocent man to cross the line.

No, it’s a story about a man’s desperate need to succeed, his last chance, and the line he is willing cross in order to get what he wants.

Or, maybe, it’s a story about a man who has gone way over the edge, and a boy who gets caught up in the man’s delusions.

How about a guy who wakes up from a six-week black-out and is coaxed into a crime plot by a bunch of grifters who convince him he’s someone he’s not?

My God, I haven’t been at the beginning for at least five years.  That’s approximately when I started writing BOULEVARD.  And, though I’ve just completed BEAT, my second novel, it wasn’t exactly like starting from the beginning, since it was a sequel.

But now I face a standalone.  I’m marveling at the realization that…anything is possible.  Sky’s the limit.  Providing, as my agent is quick to remind me, I stay in the genre in which I’ve been published.  Which is fine, I could write dark crime thrillers for the next thirty years. 

And you know what?  Maybe I can mix things up a bit, futz around with style.  I wrote those first two books in third person close, which is a bitch of a POV.  It’s like almost first person, but not.  It’s enough like first person to keep you from knowing what the other characters are thinking.  I like it, but I’m sick of it, you know what I mean?  It would be nice to explore different character points of view for a change.  It would be nice to really know what that other character thinks, instead of only knowing what my protagonist thinks that other character thinks.  Never knowing for sure until that character says, “Yes, I was exactly thinking what you thought I was thinking when you thought that in third…person…close.”  Aaaargh!

So, maybe omniscient third.  And yet I want something a little edgy, and so I’m thinking of writing in present tense.  Timothy Hallinan writes in present tense and he brings an immediacy to the story that makes it feel like you’re watching a movie.  Which is apropos, since screenplays are also written in present tense.  And I’m thinking of setting my standalone against the backdrop of Hollywood, so the present tense would also play up the blurred line between reality and illusion, which is a theme I want to explore.

Oh, God, it can be anything.  I could write in omniscient third, present tense, with alternating chapters in first person for each character. 

I almost don’t want to settle on a story, because once my mind is set the structure must be built, like a house.  Whereas now I’m letting EVERYTHING in.  I’m sponging the world around me.  It’s the most exciting part of the process, yet the most frightening as well. 

There’s been a magical serendipity around me lately, with the Murderati authors blogging about first ideas and how to start that next book.  JT’s blog that began with the photograph of the girl really made me think about process.  And Alexandra’s last blog hit home in a big way.  I printed it out and highlighted every other sentence.  Then I wrote a list of all the films and books I love, all the books or scripts I wish I had written.  And then I wrote out the major themes, just as Professor Sokoloff instructed.  

I discovered that I want to write something that combines the elements of Heart of Darkness, Crimes and Misdemeanors, Chinatown and The Player.  Can I just write that on a piece of paper and call it my book proposal?

Who wouldn’t want to read that book?  Forget about the fact that no writer can weave all those themes together in a believable thriller.  Let’s sell the proposal first and worry about the rest later.

Slowly, comfortably, a story is emerging.  A scene here, a bit of dialogue there.  I worry if the inciting incident is too over the top.  I worry that I won’t be able to capture the nuances of power and manipulation that exist in Hollywood, that I’ll make it a satire instead of a documentary.  These are things that keep me from putting pen to paper.  I’ll get over them, once I fully commit to the story.  Once I decide that the story I want to tell is the story I’d want to read.

One thing I’ve been doing is re-reading books that have a really strong voice.  Like Chuck Palahnuik’s “Fight Club” and Jim Thompson’s “The Killer Inside Me” and “Pop 1280.”  Those books are tight as hell and unique in tone and style. 

I find it strange that, although I came from the film industry, I have a very hard time visualizing my characters and settings.  I’m reluctant to focus on photographs, the way JT does, even though I know it will probably help in the long run.  I seem to want my characters to remain physically elusive, and I suspect this is a holdover from writing screenplays, where the writer is encouraged to keep his character descriptions slight.  You don’t want to describe your protagonist as Mel Gibson when the producer who buys the script has a relationship with Matt Damon.

I’m holding myself back.  Because, when I commit, I don’t want anything to get in the way.  And right now I’m focusing on getting through the copyedit of BEAT.  But what I really want to do is drop everything and bury myself in words and images and stories and ideas.  And dreams.  I want to disappear for a few weeks and dive into the recesses of my mind.  I used to do this sort of thing, back when I was eighteen, nineteen years old.  I’d catch a bus and disappear into the countryside with a couple Steinbeck novels and a notepad, and I’d be gone for days.  Gone.  I’m desperate to do that now, but life is in the way.  I envy Alexandra’s freedom to wallow in her dreams, to let the collective unconscious guide her every day. 

Last Sunday I spent the day at Venice Beach.  It was hard to pull myself away from the family, but I felt it was necessary.  Watching the insane circus of humanity was a jump-start for my creative process.  I wrote everything I saw, just as an exercise.  It got the juices going.  Quietly observing human nature is my favorite way to find my voice, my story.  It’s like meditation for me.  I found it hard not to buy a cheap sleeping bag and pitch camp in the sand with all the other vagabonds. 

Oh, my mind’s a mess.  I’m all over the place.  But maybe that’s my process.  Maybe I’m exactly where I need to be.  As long as I’m not on a deadline, I can afford to be a flibbertigibbet. 

 

 

 



 

THE REALITY OF REALITY

by Brett Battles

Okay, first a huge thanks to all those who made comments and suggestions on my last post. I gotta say I’m still digesting a lot of it, and will be mining it for topics in upcoming entries. Simply awesome.

What I’m writing about today was inspired by a suggestion in one of those comments. Nancy Laughlin posed several questions, but one jumped out at me when I reread it this morning: Is it better to make up a city or use a real one in a book?

That got me thinking about two of my favorite things: locations and setting. As many of you know, locations play a big part in my stories. In fact locations are basically characters for me. In THE CLEANER both Ho Chi Minh City, Vietnam, and Berlin, Germany, play large parts. In THE DECEIVED it’s Washington, D.C., and Singapore. And in SHADOW OF BETRAYAL (THE UNWANTED in the UK) it’s Africa, Ireland, and California. But it doesn’t stop there. In my upcoming standalone, NO RETURN (out early 2011), the action all takes place near a navy base in the high desert of California, and in THE SILENCED (the next Quinn novel, title not necessarily final, and tentatively out later in 2011), London, Paris, and northern Minnesota play big parts.

I guess what I’m trying to establish here is my location cred. Hopefully I’ve done that. If not, ugh…but I’m moving on anyway.

When I write about specific locations, it’s important to me to give the reader an accurate feel for the city or place. I try to get roads right, and directions, and local landmarks that you wouldn’t just find fishing around the internet. The reason for this is so that the reader feels like they’ve been somewhere when they read those particular scenes.

But I’ll let you in on a secret, giving a reader an accurate feel for a city or place doesn’t necessarily mean describing those places accurately. What? Heresy!! Someone muzzle him before he says anything more!!

Well, we all know that’s not going to happen, so what do I mean by this? I’ll tell you…

If you’re going to use a real-life city, it’s probably best you use one you know. You sprinkle that city with sights and locations you’re familiar with. This will help make your city more three-dimensional and “real” to your readers. And why would you want that? Simply. If a reader feels you have control and knowledge of the location you are writing about, you can then throw in things that are purely fictional.

Let me give you an example. In THE CLEANER, a large portion of the book takes place in Berlin. I used hotels and restaurants and U-Bahn stations and an open air market that all exist. My descriptions of each of those places were as accurate as they could be. But I also needed a few other locations, too. Places that weren’t really there, so I just made them up and plopped them down in the city where I needed them to be. I even made up an entire large hotel. And I’ve done similar things in all my other books, also.

I guess what I’m trying to say is if you have a handle on the place you are writing about, it’d much easier to then add in any fictional parts you may need.

Don’t get hung up on having to be 100% accurate. We are writing FICTION after all, and, therefore, have the license to create.

That brings me back to Nancy’s question… Is it better to make up a city or use a real one in a book?

My answer to that would be, Yes.

You see, whether you are making up a city or using a real one, the important thing is that readers feel you know about the place you are writing about. If they feel like you have a handle on it, then you’ve done your job. If they feel like you don’t, it’s doubtful you’ll even finish your story.

Another example from THE CLEANER. At the beginning of the book, Quinn goes to the small Colorado mountain town of Allyson. But in the real world, there is no Allyson, Colorado, at least not where I put it. But I just made it real in my mind, so when I wrote it, it was real on the page. Or at least I hope so.

So Nancy, I think the question isn’t which is better, but which does a story need?

My old writing mentor used to say – and I know he cribbed this from someone else – “Don’t let reality get in the way of telling a good story.” Now what he was referring to was when any of his students would write a scene based on something that happened in real life, and would miss an opportunity to make it better, and when he called them on it, they’d use the excuse, “But that’s not how it happened.” The thing was, it didn’t matter how it really happened, we writing stories, not history books.

So, if you’d allow me to tweak his advice just a little, in regards to today’s topic, he might have said, “Don’t let the reality of a location get in the way of telling a good story.”

Use reality. Own it. Then, when you need to, abuse it. And if reality just isn’t going to work for you, don’t be afraid to use a place pulled completely out of your mind. You are the story teller, and as such, you are creating your own reality.

So, ‘rati, how do you feel about locations in books? Do you think they need to be 100% accurate? In other words, am I full of shit? (Rob, hold your tongue.) For the writers, what’s your take on Nancy’s question? And for the readers, does how a writer handles locations make a difference to you? If so, why?

 

Now talk about reality! How about tracking your life for a whole year…check this out. A high school teacher kept track of his (2009), and this is the result:

Dan Meyer’s 2009 Annual Report from Dan Meyer on Vimeo.

 

IT’S ALIVE!!!!!

 

By J.D. Rhoades

We spend some time here talking about the pressures,  the challenges, and the frustrations of the writing life. True, it ain’t all beer and skittles. But, to be fair, there’s right much in the way of skittles. And lord, is there ever beer. Along with that, there are moments that feel so good, they remind me why  I still do this. Here’s one.

I sat down one day last week  to write  a scene for my current WIP. This book is probably the one I’ve done the most extensive outlining and pre-planning for, so I knew what I wanted to do in the scene and how it advanced the story. There’s a bit of exposition, a bit of revelation,  where the main character (a female FBI agent) is getting a teasing glimpse of exactly how big and how mean the monster is that she’s up against.

As originally conceived,  the scene presented some challenges; it takes the form of an interview the agent and her partner are doing with the CEO of a big pharmaceutical corporation.

Two people interviewing a corporate suit and his lawyer runs a severe risk of being a boring info-dump:  lots of talking, lots of exposition while the reader’s interest begins to wither and die. I sat and stared at the page for a long time, wondering how to keep that from happening. I started. I stopped. I checked my e-mail and Facebook. I went back to the document. I started again. I stopped. I picked up the guitar and played a bit. I petted the dog who was squirming around under the desk, trying to get my attention. I shooed the dog out and sat down again.

And  suddenly, as I began writing the CEO’s lines, something happened. I could see him. I could see how he looked, how he spoke, even a particular annoying mannerism he has that illustrates that he’s brilliant, but highly eccentric. His dialogue began to write itself. And as it did, the character of the partner also began to emerge. Previously, I’d known a couple of things about him: he’s big, he’s more than a little intimidating, and being FBI,  he’s a little too cocky for what he’s about to go up against. But he didn’t have a face, nor did he have much of a personailty. 

But as the scene went on, he shouldered his way in and took a bigger role in the interrogation.  Suddenly there were dimensions to him I hadn’t seen previously. He’s actually a lot smarter than he looks, but he knows when playing the dumb jock can work for him, especially when dealing with an brilliant, eccentric nerd who likes to feel superior to someone who looks exactly like the kind of guy who used to harass him in grade school.

When it was over, two characters that originally were just shadows in my mind  were living and breathing and sparring with each other. I knew them. I knew what they looked like, I knew their respective backstories. Give me a couple of minutes, and I can tell you what they had for lunch.

Damn, it’s fun when that happens. It doesn’t actually feel like I’m the one creating. It feels like people are  leaping fully formed out of my head, like Athena.  I actually leaned back and went “where the hell did THAT come from?”

In moments like that, all the rejection, all the frustration, all the exasperation with this ridiculous busness seems very remote, and you remember why you do this.

So, writers and non-writers: Tell me about the moments that remind you of why you do what you do.

When the public turns scary

by Tess Gerritsen

When I sit alone in my office, writing my stories, I imagine my readers as a big, sprawling community of friends around the world, and I want to please them.  I know I’m bound to disappoint some of them from time to time, but I hope that they’ll give me another chance, and that I’ll redeem myself in their eyes with my next book.  We writers depend on our readers for our livelihoods, and most of us try very hard to stay in their good graces. 

But sometimes, those readers make us want to run for cover.

So far, I’ve had only a few such experiences.  There was the man who leaned close and whispered how much he liked THE SURGEON (my book about a killer who slices and dices women) because it allowed him to enjoy his secret fantasies.  There was the agitated woman in the leopard-print pants who waited until the end of my booksigning to insist that I write her life story.  Which she then proceeded to tell me, ending with the sentence: “And after all that, the jury only convicted me of manslaughter!”  At which point my media escort swooped in, insisting that we had to leave now.

I count myself lucky that my fans, by and large, are nice, reasonable people, especially when I read the latest news about Susan Boyle, the shy spinster from England who shot to fame with a show-stopping performance on “Britain’s Got Talent.”  Poor Susan now has a stalker and her home has been broken into several times.  Then there was the frightening incident at Stephen King’s house several years ago, when a mentally unstable man broke into the kitchen, forcing Tabitha King to flee in her bathrobe.

This past week, I’ve witnessed yet another example of how the public has teeth — and how quickly those teeth can start ripping into an author.  I’m talking about the astonishing wrath exhibited over at the Amazon.com page of Douglas Preston’s new book, IMPACT.

Full disclosure #1: I know Doug Preston.  He’s a charming, delightful, literate man.  And we both share a lifelong passion for science.

Full disclosure #2: I’m a fan of his books.  When I board an airplane, if I’ve brought along a thriller by Preston, or by Preston and Child, I know I will be well-entertained during that flight.

Soon after Preston’s new book was released, I hopped on over to Amazon to see if readers were enjoying his book as much as I did.  I was surprised to see a number of 1-star reviews.  My surprise turned to consternation when I read those poor reviews and realized that almost all of them weren’t about the book at all.  Instead, the “reviewers” were using the site to express their fury that the Kindle edition of Impact wouldn’t be released until months after the hardcover went on sale. They expressed their rage by attacking Preston and his work, saying they would never buy another one of his books.  The New York Times caught wind of the turmoil, got Preston to comment on it, and he expressed his quite understandable annoyance with the whole affair.  Which resulted in an even more furious, even vicious onslaught of one-star reviews on his Amazon page.  (Note to self: if the New York Times ever calls asking for statement, politely decline and hang up phone.)

The public e-lynching of Douglas Preston is a frightening spectacle that will almost certainly be replayed, with other authors as fresh targets.  As a result of the recent battle between MacMillan and Amazon, Kindle e-book prices for new releases will probably be increasing across the board.  Already, I’ve received an email from a reader, complaining that the Kindle edition of my upcoming book, ICE COLD, is priced at $14.30.  “I will not be buying your book at that outrageous price,” the reader said.  The email was a civil one, but I’m bracing for others — far less civil — that will probably follow.   

What’s astonishing is that “greedy” authors are being blamed for this.  That’s like blaming the fisherman for the price of  sole meuniere on the restaurant menu.  Writers, like fishermen, are simply responsible for delivering the raw product.  Standing between us and the final consumer are processors, packagers, and retailers.  Unless a book is self-published (in which case the author can set the price) writers have absolutely no control over the final list price, in whatever format it may be published.  

Let me repeat: traditionally published authors have no control over the final list price of their books.  

In all my twenty-three years in the publishing industry, I have never been asked what my book should cost in the marketplace.  Not once.  Just like the fisherman never gets asked what the restaurant should charge for its Catch of the Day special.

Because of what happened to Preston, I thought long and hard about whether I should even be discussing this subject on a public blog.  It’s tempting to just dive under your desk and stay out of sight, where the bullets can’t find you.  But that doesn’t change the fact that every author is a potential target.  When the public gets enraged about book prices, and they want to attack, they won’t be hurling their stones at something as nameless and anonymous as the “publishing industry.”  They’ll be aiming their fury at the people whose names they know.  The names on the books.  The “rich and greedy” authors whose $14.00 e-books are — to the public — as potent a symbol of avarice as a banker’s multimillion-dollar bonus.

Put on your armor.  It’s going to get rough.

(I’m afraid I’ll be on the road when this post goes up.  I’m sorry I won’t be able to respond to comments.)

 

 

 

February

by Pari

Cornelia hates February. Most people on the East Coast probably do at this point. But down here in New Mexico, I’ve seen yellow crocuses and white narcissus blooming. How can animosity find purchase in anyone’s heart when the sun shines so unfettered in this crayon blue sky?

For me, February is a time of reflection.  When my life is as roller coaster-y as it’s been during the last few months — introspection can become paralyzing.

This month is colored with memories of my mother — her life and death — and our troubled relationship.

It’s also my birthday month. A time of celebration. A time of looking to the future. I love it for that, for its uniqueness and brevity.

Last weekend, I saw a poor confused butterfly. It fluttered across my path and, because it’s February, I was struck with both the beauty of the moment and the incredible sadness of that creature’s prospects for survival . . . because any New Mexican can tell you that this light hint of winter’s release is only a tease. We’ll have a big snow storm or two, at least one more hard freeze, before spring conquers the day.

When thinking about topics for today’s blog, I had several ideas. All of them put me squarely back into the danger zone of deep introspection and I just don’t want to go there right now. I’ve got enough on my emotional plate to feed a couple of hungry villages.

So I decided to post a few videos that make me happy. Why not give you, our ‘Rati readers, a little fun on a Monday morn?

If you’re not smiling by the end of this duet with Toots Thielemans and Stevie Wonder, you need a therapist:

I’d never heard of Andy McKee until crusing the internet last week. Though many other of his other videos have more pyrotechnics, I adore this one for the love it shows. In thinking about my mother, I wish I’d been able to write something like this in words.

 

Tom Leher is someone many people today have never heard of. Back when I was a kid, he was something of a guilty pleasure, one shared among friends — but only the right kind of friends. Most of Leher’s songs have a truly wicked center and it was difficult for me to pick the one I wanted most to post. But the song below seems particularly appropriate for mystery readers and writers . . .

So have a good remainder of February and think of me at the end of the week . . .

And, maybe, share a link to a music video that brightens your day every time you see/hear it.

Subtext

by Toni McGee Causey

 

Sometimes, it’s what you don’t say that counts the most.

That holds true in fiction, as well.

When we’re creating characters and trying to bring them to life on the page, we’re generally focused on things like character voice, motive, need, background, goals, conflict. We express those through language and syntax and action and choice. We may use descriptions and metaphors and similes and dialog to portray all of those choices.

But a lot of times, writers tend to forget to pay attention to subtext — which is “an underlying and distinct theme in a piece of writing or conversation.” 

In other words, whether you like it or not, your choices for your novel are going to communicate a meta message about how you see the world, or how you think your characters see the world. It’s not terribly complicated. For example, if every single female character in a book has to be rescued at some point or other, and no female ever comes up with a single usable good idea, then the writer’s meta message is that females are inferior. The writer may love women, may worship them, may do a fine joy in real life treating them as equals, so it’s isn’t necessarily always the case that they secretly dislike women or think they’re inferior, but one has to wonder. If every single male in a book is a loathsome cheating lowlife bastard who deserves his balls to be shot off and all men should just stand over in the corner and look pretty… well, it doesn’t exactly take a rocket scientist to figure out that message, now, does it.

Those examples, however, are fairly obvious, and most people manage to avoid them. It’s the subtler ones that will destroy a book quickly–when the particular attitude of one character over an issue is prevalent in every character, or every character of a specific gender or race… that it destroys the individuality of the character and the world of the book. Because not every character should think the same, hold the same values. And I don’t just mean the obvious, the villain and the hero. (Actually, it’s pretty interesting when the villain and the hero have the same values, but just see a different approach to obtaining a goal.) The world is full of people who, in spite of the globalization of culture, in spite of the homogenization of attitudes, still have their own individual quirks and likes and dislikes, and real character springs from that.

Subtext, gone awry, can destroy the writer’s intention.

I’m going to use commercials for examples, because they’re quick, easy, and I can post the YouTube versions here.

Now here’s a fun ad by the Dodge people which accomplished their intended subtext… they wanted to accomplish an ad with very dry humor, and portray the new Dodge Charger as the fun, sexy sports car that was also powerful and affordable. This ad worked:

 

The subtext is, “We’re not only cool under pressure, we have a dry sense of humor, and we’re fun. When everyone else is freaking out, wasting their time, we’re going to be having the time of our lives. Drive this car and be cool with us.”

Not a bad message. Hell, it made me want to go look at the car. And even though it was addressed mostly to guys, it didn’t exclude women. That’s smart marketing.

So then, thinking they were on a roll, the Dodge people came up with this ad for the Superbowl, which failed pretty miserably. (While there are some pockets on the internet which ranked this ad favorably, I saw many many forums and national columnists poke fun, and the sneer on Twitter was practically universal.)

 

What they were going for was some sort of male creed, that because the male critter was willing to suffer through such torture, and do it with patience and without upsetting the female critter, the male damned well deserved something cool to drive. 

The subtext, however, shot that all to pieces, and what they accomplished, instead, was to assert that their customer was the kind of guy who whined about small inconveniences, had no guts, no backbone, no charisma, no testosterone and no real life, and that the woman in his life was a bitch and owned him, lock, stock and racing stripes. But hey, he could buy a car. That he was unlikely to buy that car was also evident.

They made the potential customer see themselves as downtrodden wusses. Not exactly a clever move, there, because your goal as an ad person is to project something that your customer will identify with as what they want to be, and looky here, this product will give you that (or the illusion of you being like that). 

Additionally, they alienated a huge market for their cars: women. I know lots of women who love sports cars. This ad did not make them want to buy it. For a company in the throes of a bailout, that’s really not a clever approach to increasing market share.

Dodge wasn’t the only company crashing and burning during the Super Bowl… I saw a lot of complaints over the Bud Light ads, particularly this one:

 

The end slogan is, “It’s the sure sign of good times,” and I guess we’re supposed to assume that because the husband (boyfriend? brother?) managed to filch a few Bud Lights, good times were had. That’s the text of the message, but the subtext is, “Men are inappropriate jerks who wouldn’t know a book if it bit them, and only idiots drink our beer. Plus, sexy smart women think they’re lame and stupid, and barely tolerate them.”

It’s not like drinking the beer made the guy sexier to any of the women there. He certainly didn’t impress them any. He didn’t surprise us at all by actually knowing something about the book. (That would have been a very nice surprise… a book club where the husband is about to take off for a ball game, hears the discussion, grabs the beer from the fridge, crashes the discussion and actually not only knows something about the book, but is intelligent and makes the party fun.)

Now here’s a commercial that addresses subtext head on and, in my opinion, succeeds. Not only do I remember the commercial, but I really want to go pick up some of that Old Spice just to see… ya know?

And this one… cracks me up:

 

I’m sure there’s something negative about a woman prone to violence, (and most people just said, ‘ya think?’)… but I love the subtext that she’s not going to be a victim, she’s not going to be subtle. The “Oh, shit,” expression when she realizes what she’s done makes her human and flawed and funny and I appreciated the repair shop’s attitude. (I also liked the small detail of the actor who arrives in the car just really seeming to be a sleazy two-timer–it subtly reinforces her assertions.)

So, when you’re thinking of creating your characters, think about the long term affects of the subtext. Look for patterns of repetition which could reinforce a negative stereotype you hadn’t meant to portray, or an attitude that is counter-intuitive to what you’d hoped to have the reader feel in that moment. Subtext / meta messages register, and as you can see in these 30 second videos, they register fast.

As an aside, I wanted to announce that this is the last week to sign up for Margie Lawson’s phenomenal class called EMPOWERING CHARACTERS’ EMOTIONS. Class runs from March 1st through March 31st. The class is an online class that works via a yahoogroup loop… and it’s designed for anyone, any genre, published or unpublished, because you work at your own pace and are challenged at your own level. (Trust me–Margie is beyond awesome. Her classes are routinely packed which means terrific conversation between attendees.)

This class is sponsored by PASIC, a Published Author Special Interest Chapter, but you *do not* have to be a member to attend. The sign up information is here and the deadline is February 27th. (I am the moderator.)

But for today, how about naming a TV show, commercial or movie where the subtext destroyed the intent? Or made you not enjoy the premise of the show? (For example, I know some people who just cannot get past the era of MAD MEN and the misogynistic / racist vibe.)

All commenters (save my fellow ‘Rati), will be eligible either for Margie’s class above OR a $30 gift certificate to MYSTERY LOVERS BOOKSTORE (which ships for FREE, any book you want, they can get). For international entrants, an Amazon gift card can be substituted. Contest open through Friday, midnight, CST. 

The Weekend Academy I’d Give my Eye-teeth to Attend…

By Cornelia Read

I got an email from Lee Lofland a couple of weeks ago, asking whether I could donate a book to an auction at The Writers’ Police Academy event he’s organizing (September 24-26, 2010.) When I looked up the Academy website, I was overwhelmed with determination to go–it just sounds amazing.

I wrote him back saying I’d be honored to send a book, and asking whether I could interview him about the event here on Murderati, because this seems like something a lot of us would love to take part in.

Cornelia: I’m not someone who uses the word “unique” very often, but in this case it’s justified: yours is the most unique writing conference I think I’ve ever run across, and the one I’d most give my eyeteeth to attend this year. You said in your original email that “This is not a writer’s conference. There are no agents, no pitch sessions, and no editors – just plenty of handcuffing, police cars, firearms training, crime scene investigations, accident reconstruction, fire and rescue training with real fire and rescue equipment, explosives investigations (airport and other), SWAT, homicide investigation, and much, much more. All things to help you get your police, fire, EMS, and forensics facts straight.” Awesome!!! How did the conference come about?

Lee: First of all, thanks for having me here on Murderati, one of my favorite blogs. I spend so much time on my own site that I have little time to visit others. But this is one of my pet lurking spots. I am indeed a fan.

The Writers’ Police Academy was an idea that came to me as a result of stumbling through bad police information in books written by some of my favorite authors. Also, TV is not very accurate in its portrayal of police procedures and forensics. Of course, TV has a better excuse for fudging facts—they only have thirty to sixty minutes to cram in as much excitement as possible.

As a reader, I’m not as forgiving (although you’d never know I cut TV any slack if you’d ever read my Castle reviews) when I turn to page forty-seven and discover a modern-day officer smelling cordite while racking a round into the chamber of his department-issued Sig Sauer. Or, when a plainclothes officer wears an ankle holster containing a pistol that’s far too large and bulky for that purpose. Ten minutes online, or a quick email to me (or a peek at my blog) and you’ll know that neither of those things should/could ever happen.

Over the years, many writers have transferred, without thought or care, what they’ve seen on television into their books, possibly thinking that information is fact. And why not? We’ve been seeing this stuff for years. Television and film have crammed this garbage down out throats as fast and furiously as they can. Well, I’d finally had enough and set out on a mission!

First I started speaking at conferences and other similar events. Then I wrote my book a couple of years ago for the sole purpose of helping writers learn the truth about police procedures, police tools and equipment, and forensics. Of course, I’d like to think I can write like James Lee Burke, so that when you open the pages of my book you smell gunpowder and swamp water. Still, the book wasn’t enough, so I followed up with my blog. But I still wasn’t satisfied. I wasn’t doing enough! I felt that there had to be a better way to help writers experience this stuff for themselves.

I wanted them to have the opportunity to activate their senses, not just read that when an officer sits, the flesh on his side is sometimes pinched between his Kevlar vest and gun belt. 

Writers should smell real burnt powder from a concussion grenade. They need to hear the explosion when that grenade is tossed into a building where a murderer is hiding out. They really must experience the rush of having a suspect point a weapon at them and then fire! They need to feel that heart-pounding moment when a little old lady suddenly pulls a weapon during a domestic dispute call. Do you shoot, or not? Well, you’d better, or she’ll blast you before you can bat an eyelash, for the last time.  I’ve been there and done that. Now it’s your turn. We’re giving you an opportunity to experience a very realistic day in the life of your protagonist!

Attendees of the Writers’ Police Academy will be doing all those things—facing old ladies with guns, seeing burning buildings, arresting bad guys and taking them down, smelling the after-effects of explosions, and more. Never before has there been anything like this. We’re very fortunate to have the opportunity to offer this event.

We hosted a mini version of the academy last year at a conference just outside Cincinnati and it was a huge success. So, I contacted some friends at an actual police academy in North Carolina to see if there was any interest in hosting the event. Well, since many of the folks at the North Carolina police academy are readers and fans of mystery, romance, romantic suspense, and thrillers, they welcomed the idea to help stop the nonsense they read in books written by their own favorite authors. We quickly set up a meeting with the powers in charge, and within days the project was a go. We’ve had full cooperation from the entire staff since that day.

As soon as I had the go ahead, I contacted literary agent Verna Dreisbach (Verna’s also a former police officer) to see if she’d be willing to sign on as my partner in this madness, and we’ve been making preparations since. I’ve also been fortunate to have the assistance of a fantastic planning committee—Susan Greene, Nancy Kattenfeld, Lynette Hampton, and Mari Freeman, members of SinC, MWA, RWA, and local romance writers chapters. We wouldn’t be able to pull this off without them.

Believe me, this is a ton of hard, hard, work, because not only do we have the usual logistics to work out, we also have the added worries of lining up real police officers, academy instructors, actual police equipment, canines, bomb experts, jail cells, police cars, weapons, lab equipment…well, you get the idea. This event is the real deal!

You told me in your most recent email that “We’re actually going to blow up stuff, set a building on fire, investigate a murder, reconstruct an auto accident, train on a firearms simulator, handcuff, learn defensive tactics, spray someone with pepper spray, Taser someone, examine evidence in a real crime lab, and…well, you get the idea.” I LOVE the idea of blowing stuff up, of course—and everything else listed here– but who gets to be Tasered and pepper-sprayed?

I was hoping either you, Tess, or Alafair might volunteer to be our bad guys. No? Well, in that case, we’ve lined up actual police academy recruits (remember, we’re hosting this event at a real police, fire, jail, and EMS academy) to act as our unfortunate victims. I’ll be the first to tell you that it’s no picnic getting pepper-sprayed, or shot with a Taser. I’ve experienced both. Never again!

Your keynote speaker will be Jeffery Deaver, who’s terrific. Tell us a little about the other people on your faculty…

Jeff Deaver is a fantastic speaker. He always delivers a message that’s not only inspiring and entertaining, it’s very informative. We’re lucky to have him on board. We also have Jonathan Hayes as a special guest. Jonathan is a wonderful writer, and he’s also a senior medical examiner in New York City. He’ll be presenting a few pathology-related workshops, and he’s also presenting a major session on autopsy in the main auditorium on Friday afternoon.

Immediately after the Friday evening reception (we have a special musical guest from Atlanta lined up to entertain us during the reception) I’ll be presenting a night owl session where I’ll be taking everyone through an actual homicide case, involving love, drugs, homicide, and dismemberment. This is a case that I’ve been a part of for quite a while, and I’ll be sharing actual crime scene photos, and other evidence. It’s a very compelling story, a story that’s perfect to experience just prior to turning in for the night!

We’re also featuring:

ATF Special Agent Rick McMahan, who’ll be teaching workshops on weapons and fight scenes.

Verna Dresibach is scheduled to teach classes on jail searches and DUI’s (there may be some actual drinking involved in this workshop).

Dr. Denene Lofland will be conducting workshops about microscopic murder and bioterrorism (chemicals, poisons, bacteria, and viruses).

Forensic psychologist Rick Helms will be dazzling us with his vast knowledge of serial killers.

We also have many, many actual police academy instructors who’ll be leading workshops on crime scene investigation, crime labs (you’ll be testing actual evidence in a real crime lab), FATS training (firearms training simulator), SWAT, building searches, arson investigations, explosives, accident reconstruction, fire department operations, and much, much more. We’re also going to have representatives from several police departments on hand through out the academy to answer your questions. They’ll have booths set up displaying police and fire equipment, as well as offering live demonstrations on Friday and Saturday, such as SWAT, motorcycles, fire trucks, ambulances, and canines. A few of those instructors as follows:

 

  • Eric Holloman, Dept. Chair Criminal Justice – Accident reconstruction:
  • Susan Pons, Assoicate Professor, Criminal Justice- Crime lab (fingerprint and impression evidence):
  • Mike MacIntosh, Bomb and HazMat Expert
  • Jerry Coble, Ass’t  Fire Marshall for Guilford County – Arson investigation and basic firefighting 
  • Jerry Cooper – FATS training/Taser Demo  
  • Deputy Catherine Netter – Jail searches 
  • Bob Walters, BLET Coordinator; Lt. Randy Shephered, Deputy Vic Maynard – Police equipment and tools:
  • Defensive tactics/Handcuffing and arrest techniques: Guilford County Sheriff’s Dept.  
  • Bill Lanning, Assoicate Professor in Criminal Justice

 

Where and when will the conference be held?

The Writers’ Police Academy (remember, this isn’t a conference) will be at Public Safety Academy on the campus of Guilford Technical Community College in Jamestown, N.C., which is just outside of Greensboro, and very near Mayberry and Mt. Pilot. The event kicks off on Friday September 24, 2010 and ends Sunday at noon after a fun de-briefing session.

By the way, the Mayberry Days celebration takes place the same weekend—I planned it that way—so if you’d like to drive on over while you’re in the area, you can see Thelma Lou, The Darlings, Otis, Floyd, Karen Knotts (Don Knotts’ daughter), the old Mayberry Jail and sheriff’s car, the Andy Griffith Museum, and more. You can even participate in the apple peeling contest or enjoy a pork chop sandwich in the diner while the Mayberry patrol car zips by on the street outside. You might even see Otis stumble by on his way to the courthouse. Oh, there are mule-powered wagon tours of the town, too. It’s a real hoot!

The conference website mentions The Don Knotts Silver Bullet Writing Contest and the Krispy Kreme Golden Donut Award for best short fiction. Who can enter, and what are the deadlines? And, of course, the most important question: will real donuts be involved?

The Don Knotts Silver Bullet novel contest is named after, of course, Don Knotts from the Andy Griffith Show. Don’s daughter, Karen, is a good friend of my blog, The Graveyard Shift. She once wrote a wonderful article for the blog about her famous dad, and even supplied us with a couple of never-before-seen photographs.

Karen has graciously offered to let us use her father’s name in connection with the contest, which is open to everyone and anyone. The Silver Bullet award will be presented for the best manuscript presented to our panel of judges—literary agent Kimberly Cameron of Kimberley Cameron and Associates, literary agent Elizabeth Pomada of Larsen Pomada Literary Agency, publisher Benjamin LeRoy of Tyrus Books, and Poison Pen Press acquisitions editor, Annette S. Rogers. The winner will not only receive the physical award, they’ll also be afforded the opportunity to submit their entire manuscript for possible representation by one of the agents, or for publication by the publishers. Of course, the winning manuscript must be worthy of publication for the publishers to accept it.

The Krispy Kreme Golden Donut contest is a short story contest. Writers can submit a story about a common theme ( a photo by photographer Sunday Kaminski) similar to the monthly contest seen in Alfred Hitchcock Mystery Magazine. There’s a reason for that particular rule, and we’ll tell all a bit later. (Sunday Kaminski’s work has been featured in the Alfred Hitchcock Mystery Magazine, and quite frequently on my blog).

Details for both contests will be available on our website within the next few days.

Of course donuts are involved. In fact, Krispy Kreme is the sponsor of the Golden Donut contest. They’re also furnishing donuts and coffee for the event. We simply could not have a real police academy and not have donuts on hand!

Conference proceeds benefit the Criminal Justice Foundation of the college that’s hosting the event, Guilford Technical Community College in Jamestown, N.C. What are the aims of this foundation?

The Criminal Justice Foundation is in place to help fund basic and in-service training needs for police officers. The money we donate to the foundation will be used for equipment, teaching supplies, and other necessary items that simply aren’t available through normal state funding. Times are tough for education, especially when it comes to training law enforcement officers. And this particular group of police instructors have a special connection to writers. Many of them are the experts who’ve answered police-related questions, either directly or through me, or they’ve provided some bit of information for my book and blog. 

Anything else you’d like us to know?

Yes. If you can only attend one event this year, the Writers’ Police Academy should be it. Writers conferences comes and go—they’re fun and I love them, but they’re the same old, same old. But you may never have this opportunity again. There’s not another place in the world where writers can train like real police officers. This is not a watered down citizens police academy. Not at all. We’ve put all our energy into making this event special. We want everyone to learn and have tons of fun while doing so.

This will be an action-packed weekend. In fact, we’re starting Saturday off with a BANG (literally). Do yourself a favor, and be there. We’ll need help putting out that fire!

Thanks again for having me, Cornelia. I hope we see you there. I think we have a pair of handcuffs with your name on them.

For details and updates, please visit the Writers’ Police Academy website at http://www.writerspoliceacademy.com/index.html

Or, visit The Graveyard Shift at http://www.leelofland.com/wordpress/ for more of the same.

If anyone has questions they can contact me at lofland32@msn.com.

I would like to take time to thank our sponsors, if I may.

Writers Digest

The Oak Ridge Boys

Singer/recording artist Joe Bonsall, The Oak Ridge Boys

Author Deborah LeBlanc

Just Write Sites

They’ve all been wonderful and quite generous with their contributions, and with donations for the academy attendees. In fact, The Oak Ridge Boys have donated a really nice raffle basket containing several of their CD’s, signed books, and other neat items. Joe Bonsall (the voice on Elvira) and the Oak Ridge Boys’ manager/agent Kathy Harris have been simply wonderful. We’ve been in almost daily contact since they first signed on. What a great group of people!

Writers Digest has gone all out with their generous offerings. One of the items they’ve donated for the raffle is a complete set of the new Howdunit series, which includes Poisons (Serita Stevens and Anne Bannon), Police Procedure and Investigation (my book), and Forensics (D.P. Lyle). The new Weapons book may be out by that time as well. Just Write Sites designed, hosts, and maintains our fabulous website (they also take care of my website and blog), and author Deborah LeBlanc dug really, really deep into her bank account.

See you in September!

Lee

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Okay, don’t you totally want to go to this, ‘Ratis? I think I might even agree to be pepper sprayed… totally worth it!

(BONUS: Everyone here on Murderati will be donating books for a group blog basket at Lee’s WPA auction. Yea!)